I am actually a model, believe it or not.

When I was a little girl, like five years ago... Only kidding. I was actually somewhere in the neighborhood of ten... My mother used to ignore my sister and me. I was a bit of a little shit, so I'd go into her closet and dig out her Polaroid camera and film. My sister and I would make little sets and I'd shoot pictures of either her or of the both of us. I remember shooting the most retarded picture and thinking that it was the most genius thing EVER.

I had Chrissy (my sis) sit behind the rungs of a wooden chair, and had her hold two of the bars, and then told her to "pretend like" she was in prison. I remember taking shot after shot, trying to get the perfect crop, and wasting a butt-load of film in the process. In the end, it was crap, but at the time, I thought that I was the most creative person in the whole world. I know. What a loser.

Soon, I was bugging my mom to let me take pictures of her. I would pretty up her bed, and have her wear her fanciest dresses, and I'd Polaroid away. Soon, I was barking out orders and having her pose like a pro. I even remember busting out a fan to blow her hair for that "dramatic" look. Looking back, I actually wonder where I'd learned that from. Weird.

Anywho, my mother was quite proud of my talent. She used to brag and tell people how great of a photographer I was, and she'd bust out my Polaroids and show them off. I'm sure it was just an excuse to show off how hot she was, but I was pretty confident that I was awesome.

Teenage years come... Soon I am wasting all of my money on Funsavers and processing. Of course, I was only taking pictures of my hardcore friends at school or at parties. I wish I had been more creative at the time, but unfortunately, all of my photos are of my friends posing and smiling. If I had known then what I know now, I would've shot candid B&Ws of them doing drugs and puking at parties. That would've been awesome.

I did, however, feel a distinct yearning to get into real photography, so I noted to my high school counselor that I wanted to be in Photography as my first choice for an elective. My second choice was Drama, and my third was Drafting. I guess that there was a shortage of girls in Drafting, so they put me in that class as the only girl, instead of giving me Photography. And Drama was open, so they gave me that as well. I was bummed, but since I only cared about boys at the time, I was soon over it.

Not too much later, I had made a number of friends in the Photography class. A few of them had asked me to pose as their subjects for different projects. I suppose that this is how I initially found a real interest in modeling. I posed, and got some cool B&W's out of it in return.

Fast forward to a few years later... I started modeling at around nineteen. I made friends with a handful of photographers, and my interest in photography began to peak. I would look at pictures of myself shot by other photographers and would think, "this would look better if he'd shot it from this angle," or, "if it were lit this way, it would've looked much better." I decided that I should become a photographer so that I could shoot myself. I was already doing everything else myself, such as hair, makeup, set design, web design, etc.

I started taking photos at events so that I could add updates to my site. At every photo opportunity available, I'd make sure to have my little camera handy. I took candid photos of my friends and roommates that were models for practice, and photography became a hobby of mine.

At around the age of twenty-three, I started working on a project with a friend of mine that was a photographer. I shot models, did set design, and hair/ makeup. Although I only shot a few models, I was completely addicted.

Soon after, I would shoot my best friend and myself as much as possible in my little apartment. We'd dress up, pack on the makeup, and do pseudo- photo shoots as much as possible.

In December of 2004, I received the camera of my dreams as a gift, along with some lights, a camera bag, a reflector, and a light meter (I LOVE YOU!). Since then, it has been non-stop photo shoots on my white wall in my living room. I hope to upgrade soon to a house so that I can make a mini-studio out of it, and shoot 'til seeing a camera makes me sick.

So the purpose of this site is mainly to be a sort of photo-journal for myself to look back on. The beginning of my photography journal starts in December of 2004 when I received my camera, and I am going to update my journal after every shoot. Hopefully I'll be able to look at the first entries twenty years from now and laugh at how horrible I was. We'll see, I guess...

Cher
01.29.05

I'd also like to say thank you to Mo for the camera and stuff because without it I'd never have started shooting, to Brian for being a wonderful teacher (he taught me how to use my camera, lights, and light meter in forty-five minutes over the phone!), to Chris for being an inspirational mentor (You're the awesome-est!), to Hannah for being a wonderful and willing subject, to Chrissy for knowing how to "pretend like" she was in prison at six years old, and to the members of my site for being so supportive over the years (Gripper, Allen, Coco, Rockcold... <3 you!)